Dear Santa,
It’s that time of the year again. Everyone has sent you their requests and I am sure you are inundated at the moment. I am sorry to bother you.
I have tried, but haven’t particularly been the best I could possibly be this year. I have made a few mistakes. I hear though, that you have a big heart so I hope you can forgive me. The last time you would have heard from me would have been when I was 8 years old or thereabout and I asked you for a dolly. Thank you for that, she was beautiful. I haven’t come to you in a few years because I have been busy growing up. Shortly after that request I went into my teenage years and my eyes began to see the world differently and I lost my prelapsarian childhood/youth. Now, things are not that simple any more. Being a woman has brought with it all sorts of responsibilities and challenges that I never imagined possible as a child. Maybe if knew then what I knew now, I would have asked you for something a little bit different.
In lieu of this Santa, this year, I ask for something pretty intangible. Santa, this world is such a crazy maze. A lot of times I find myself going left or right and still ending up in the same spot. Santa, this world is fraught with winding roads. I know I am merely human and should expect nothing supernatural about my foresight but sometimes I wonder if a little peep ahead would have been asking too much. Santa, this world is full of disappointment and shock and twist and pain and Santa, tell me, who created death? Why can we never be prepared for the pain?
So I was telling you about my request for something ethereal this year, I won’t ask you for a dolly. But, I won’t ask you for courage or good vision or the power to deal with emotional trauma. This year Santa, I ask you to reduce me to love. If I am able to love as God intended love to be, then I think I will be alright. I will be able to forgive, I will be able to forget, I will be able to accept people for who they are and despite flaws, they will be endeared to me. I will be able to rise above disappointment and I will be able to see the bigger picture when I know that I will never mortally see someone I love ever again because they have died. I will be able to look at my maze or winding road and embrace the challenge and where I would normally complain and wallow in self pity; instead, I will smile and be thankful for the two feet of straight road that is within my vision at that point in time. When a baby cries Santa, I will forget about the panic of what baby needs at that time, but instead tickle baby’s gorgeous toes and bask in the most beautiful sound of baby giggling, for God who created ten perfect little toes obviously has a sense of humour – amazing! When my friend rings me up at
Santa, yesterday morning, my daughter put a striking flower in my hair and she was convinced the flower made me the most gorgeous woman in the whole wide world. ‘It’s yovyi mummy’ she said. Something in her outlook to life softened my heart instantly. Therefore Santa, I reckon that if I could love, love and love with her naivety, that I will be able to see life through her eyes, the eyes of a child. If I can do this, the world will be brand new again and when I smile, it will come from somewhere deep down in my heart.
Ok so maybe this is a bit premature Santa, I forgot to ask, do you do intangible gifts? Thank you and merry Christmas!
4 comments:
Santa is only one man. Does he really have the power for that kind of miracle? Cos a miracle is what it would be! This world has the power to turn even the most softest of hearts hard!
The fact that you want to find that special place again is the right step to getting it. Good luck! Save some for me when you find it x
Hmmm...a deep request. But I think you should direct it to God. I think I need to pray such a prayer too. Glad you're back. I was getting scared you'd taken off.
Yes he is only one man but he brings gifts, right? Hence I asked at the end whether my letter was kind of premature, and whether he actually does intangible gifts because everyone knows he tends to do dolls and toy cars....
It's a deep request and yes, its meant for God and not really for Santa. I think thats the irony of the letter because I think the writer actually recognises that :-)
doug, thanks for welcoming me back. life caught up with me somewhat....
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